How to Process Grief During the Christmas Season
As Christmas draws near, you may find yourself wrestling with a sense of loss. If you’re feeling overshadowed by grief during this typically joyous time, know that you are not alone. This post aims to gently guide you through finding moments of peace and joy amidst the challenges of the grieving process.
Grief during holidays can feel particularly intense. It’s hard not to connect with special memories of past Christmases and yearn for what once was.
If you find yourself in this place of sorrow:
Much sorrow in processing grief is focused upon what has been lost. Here is my personal list of things I continue to mourn after losing both of my parents in 2021: celebrating birthdays and our favorite holiday—Christmas together, sharing struggles, remembering stories of the past, creating new memories, finding comfort in life’s difficult moments, phone calls on ordinary days, shopping for a new outfit, discussing the latest episode of Dancing With The Stars or The Voice, meeting for lunch, daily check-ins, worshiping side by side in church, pork chop gravy, shared sorrow at the illness or loss of a friend or loved one, text messages, being prayed for, voice mails about a frustration with technology, them caring about what I care about, and a million other trivial but sacred moments of connection and imperfect love.
The depth of loss on some days can be absolutely profound and feel heart- wrenching. But remember…you got to love and be loved by these wonderfully imperfect humans. While they no longer are companions on your earthly journey, you carry their legacy of love in your heart. It brings much comfort and helps ease the pain of loneliness.
Wherever you find yourself this Christmas, whether it’s joyful, deeply saddened or somewhere in between, it’s ok. Don’t deny your reality. Embrace it. Be kind and give yourself grace to be where you are. For when you do, you will experience greater peace and healing.
Also, remember that you’re still here. You’re not alone. There’s more work to be done. There are people to love, serve, learn from, and grow with. God is still good.
After experiencing a loss, you might feel like joy will never come, especially around Christmas. However, there are things you can do to take steps towards joy this Christmas season:
As you navigate this Christmas season, each step you take is a stride towards healing. Remember to embrace the love and memories that surround you. These are your beacons of light in your journey of grief and healing. For more guidance on coping with grief, please click here to schedule a complimentary call with me.
December 12, 2023
BY DR. RICHELLE HOEKSTRA-ANDERSON
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By Dr. Richelle Hoekstra-Anderson & Tom Ziglar